Wanna know my rules on how to dress to parties and other fancy-pancy-need-to-look-good-and-presentable type of occasions? I have a few simple guidelines that I have followed for years.
It will make you look happy, sweet and beautiful even if you have pesto in your teeth. You will also be more approachable. But be careful not to make it a fake smile or a fake laughter. A real smile is all over your face, especially in your eyes. If I ever need to spice up my smile, I just imagine people in crappy Batman costumes. It always makes me laugh. For real. People who smile with their eyes, will get those lovely smile wrinkles around their eyes at thirty and after that you don´t even have to show teeth anymore to smile. It´s magic. :)
2. Good posture.
The prettiest or most expensive evening dress will look like shit on you if you can´t wear it standing up properly. A good posture will make you look confident and able. It will make an B-cup look like a C-cup (if you want them bigger) and make you look taller. I´m tall and still keep my good posture, even while wearing high heels. If somebody feels I´m too tall for them while doing so, it just tells me they have bad self esteem, and I don´t. Learn to keep your posture it also while sitting and walking. Remember to loosen up your shoulders so they don´t get tense.
3. Don´t show it all.
The most stylish women I know never wore clothes that are tight or show too much skin. Marilyn Monroe once said that "Your clothes should be tight enough to show you're a woman but loose enough to show you're a lady”. Your clothes should never be so small that they show lingerie lines or pattern through the fabric. It never looks classy, even in daywear or on the beach. A good fit leaves room for you to breathe and move comfortably. Invest in powder colored lingerie sets if you love wearing white. As a seamstress I have to consider how people move in their clothes and make them accordingly. If you doubt that your skirt/dress is too short, just stand in front of a mirror (back facing mirror) and bend forward. If you see your knickers from between your legs, others will see them as well. It is too short. You can check cleavage the same way. Stand in front of a mirror and bend forward. See you boobs or bra? In that case so will everyone else, e v e r y time you sit down. We always bend forward when sitting down. Or you can do the Kim Basinger / Basic Instinct -test for hem checks. Bring a chair in front of a mirror and sit. Cross your legs and change. Do you see too much? Women actually do this movement every time they get out of a car. Ever wondered why bouncers at club door always check the short skirted hot chicks getting out from vehicles? Yup..
4. Comfortable shoes.
I will never understand women who wear uncomfortable shoes just because they think the shoe looks pretty. Never. If the shoe is killing your feet after an hour, it´s no good. First your posture will go and then your smile. People don´t smile authentically while they are in pain. I´ve seen so many beautiful women despite of what they wear turn into complete monsters just because their shoes are shit. It´s never someone elses fault that you decided to wear pain so no point complaining about it to you boyfriend. If you need to wear The Killers, bring along another pair so you can change at some point. Or at least some blister plasters for first aid. If the shoe fits well, you should be able to dance in them. Dancing is essential for a successful night out. Never wear new shoes to an event before walking them in. I usually wear my new party babies first around the house and if I survive, they are keepers.
Yet comfortable shoes can be high. I personally rely on my Jeffrey Campbell Litas for parties. They give me extra six inches (15cm) height but are comfortable enough to wear for up to 6 hours of standing and walking. The platform is crucial. The shoes actual height is only thee inches if you take out the platform. The heel is also wide enough so I won´t wobble on my way. The lacing is supporting my ankle which helps my calf to relax a bit. But to be honest, if you want to be remembered or seen, invest in hats and other headwear. When I have my style lectures, in the middle of it all I always ask my audience how many of them have noticed (and admired) my hat or head scarf. And how many of them can tell me what type of shoes I´m wearing. None so far have noticed the shoes... People don´t stare at your feet in parties, especially men, so no point in wearing pretty shoes just for them. Other women might notice them, but that´s not why you wear them, correct? But a hat or an amazing head piece will have people looking into your eyes all evening and they will remember you because you are the only stunning gal there in a hat. If hats are too much for you, some french netting will get you far even with out a hat. Queen Elisabeth has always been working hats like a Lady and a Boss.
5. Take it easy on the perfume.
It´s never good to leave a trail of scents after you when you pass people by at parties. It can be actually very annoying to most people since the chances are they do not like you brand of flowers or spices that much. Just one spray is enough and then you walk through it. I´ve actually met some of the best people in my life by not wearing any perfume at all. Let your nose guide you. People hug me and some go "You smell lovely today. What is that?" I just smile and know that I need to talk to this person more because they are my chemical match. The sense of smell is so underrated on people when nature relies in it daily.
6. Safety pins.
Keep them on you at all times. They don´t take much space in your purse or pocket, but can be a lifesaver when needed. To you or your or someone else. Except in airport security checks..
Take a deep breath. Olivia Joules wrote in her Rules of Living that "People are not thinking of you, they are thinking of themselves, just like you." So don´t worry if you have pesto in your teeth, holes in your pantyhose, toilet paper stuck in your heel or a fly open. The chances are no one will notice. And if you do all the other things on this list, they will definitely not mind it. I once attended a blog award ceremony with a half shaven head (the sides of my head are shaved to 5mm). I decided to do a trim before I left and my hair shavers battery ran out mid way before I had to go to the event. I had no choice but to go with a very unfinished do. But it was a test. I wore my hair up with the biggest earrings I could find, comfortable shoes and a smile as wide as a boat. I even won a prize at the awards! And n o b o d y noticed my half shaven hair. Bam! Tested! And it works. So relax. It´s gonna be alright.
So basically good style has very little to do with what you are
actually wearing and everything to do with how you wear it.
I´ll finish with this.
"Don’t be into trends. Don’t make fashion own you, but you decide what you are, what you want to express by the way you dress and the way you live."
— Gianni Versace
Have a great week folks!